#35 – Shred

Apart from burning my tongue on molten hot lava pizza sauce, I think I’ve suffered the most self inflicted food injuries from tortilla chips. Occasionally one will flip exactly the wrong way and stab the roof of my mouth. I’ll jam one into my gums, stab my tongue or even miss my mouth altogether and draw blood from my cheek. Mostly though it’s the repeated slicing into the corners of my mouth over and over. It’s a sensitive area to be dragging salted sandpaper across.

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11 thoughts on “#35 – Shred”

  1. Kiera says:

    “Do you want to know how I got my scars?”

    1. kingklash says:

      Were the chips made in Glasgow?

      Or were they Ninjitos, for stealthy infiltration of even the most fortified dip?

  2. R2T says:

    tortilla chips..weapons of munch destruction!

    1. das-g says:

      “munch distraction”

  3. EnderQON says:

    The worst is when you swallow a chip that hasn’t been adequately chewed yet and it scrapes all the way down… ouch.

    1. jecca says:

      But they’re so tasty, and you still have a lot left in the bag, so you keep eating them, effectively rubbing salt into your freshly-opened esophageal wound.

  4. Falos says:

    Ah, my poor tortured gums…

  5. LongshotLink says:

    Eh, my biggest problem was always having a sharp edge go right under my fingernails while I wasn’t paying attention. Those sharp corners are nasty little buggers, aren’t they?

  6. Hi-Pi 1029 says:

    They’re even worse when you have braces that already scratch at your mouth, and you have half-chewed chip stuck in between the teeth and the wire.
    I was finishing off some tortilla chips as I read this comic.

  7. Domestigoth says:

    My solution is to buy the bite-sized tortilla chips instead of the normal ones. My favourite brand are both bite-sized and round-shaped, so that the potential for injury is further minimized.

    My most common food-related injury is when I’m drinking something through a straw, then absent-mindedly forget that there’s a straw in it and go to pick up my drink and take a sip directly from the glass, thus stabbing myself in the face with a straw. Fortunately I wear glasses, or I’m sure I’d have lost an eye or two through this process.

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